amberherron

~ Despairing of People ~

Refusing to be disillusioned is the cause of much of the suffering of human life.  And this is how that suffering happens - if we love someone, but do not love God, we demand total perfection and righteousness from that person, and when we do not get it we become cruel and vindictive; yet we are demanding of a human being something which he or she cannot possibly give.  There is only on e Being who can completely satisfy to the absolute depth of the hurting human heart, and that is the Lord Jesus Christ.  Our Lord is so obviously uncompromising with regard to every human relationship because He knows that every relationship is not based on faithfulness to Himself will end in disaster.  Our Lord trusted no one, and never placed His faith in people, yet He was never suspicious or bitter.  Our Lord's confidence in God, and in what God's grace could do for anyone, was so perfect that He never despaired, never giving up hope for any person.  If our trust is placed in human beings, we will end up despairing of everyone.
-Oswald Chambers

I read this yesterday morning and feel that it is a great point.  I have been on both the giving end of this type of situation and over the last year very much on the receiving end.  I overheard Jon answering some interview questions about conflict yesterday.  He made a great point - if you are a leader, then you will become a target of conflict and criticism, so expect it.  It is very true.  I'd like to take it a step further and say that this is because individuals are learning to rely more on their leaders (pastor, etc.) rather than on God.  This always leads to disappointment since a pastor is a fellow sinner and not perfect.  The church (universal) would be so much healthier if we could rely on the Holy Spirit to help us not to grow suspicious and bitter.  We too could say - like Jesus - that we never give up hope for any person.  I would've loved to have read this a year ago when facing some disappointments.  This helps me now, however, as I pray for and refuse to give up hope for God's grace to work and heal individuals.  I hope it encourages you in some way as well.

~ John 15 ~

I have added reading "My Utmost for His Highest" by Oswald Chambers to my daily routine.  The last week included an ongoing series surrounding John 15.  It was interesting to find that Josh was preaching on that same passage at church Sunday!  Anyhow, here are a few compelling quotes that stood out to me...

Think of the things that take you out of the position of abiding in Christ.  You say, "Yes, Lord, just a minute - I still have this to do.  Yes, I will abide as soon as this is finished, or as soon as this week is over.   It will be all right, Lord.  I will abide then."  Get moving - begin to abide now.  In the initial stage it will be a continual effort to abide, but as you continue it will become so much a part of your life that you will abide in Him without any conscious effort.  Make the determination to abide in Jesus wherever you are now or wherever you may be placed in the future.

If I am a friend of Jesus, I must deliberately and carefully lay down my life for Him.  It is a difficult thing to do, and thank God that it is.  Salvation is easy for us, because it cost God so much.  But the exhibiting of salvation in my life is difficult.  God saves a person, fills him with the Holy Spirit, and then says, in effect, "Now you work it out in your life, and be faithful to Me, even though the nature of everything around you is to cause you to be unfaithful."  And Jesus says to us, "...I have called you friends..." Remain faithful to your Friend, and remember His honor is at stake in your bodily life.

~ Thoughts from Oswald Chambers ~

If Jesus ever commanded us to do something that He was unable to equip us to accomplish, He would be a liar.  And if we make our own inability a stumbling block or an excuse not to be obedient, it means we are telling God that there is something which He has not yet taken into account.  Every element of our own self-reliance must be put to death by the power of God.  The moment we recognize our complete weakness and our dependence upon Him will be the very moment that the Spirit of God will exhibit His power.
-Oswald Chambers in My Utmost for His Highest

~ How Much Do You Want? ~

A GREAT quote I read yesterday...

We are able to have as much of God as we want.  Christ puts the key to His treasure chest in our hands and invites us to take all we desire.  If someone is allowed into a bank vault, told to help himself to the money, and leaves without one cent, whose fault is it if he remains poor?  And whose fault is it that Christians usually have such meager portions of the free riches of God? - Alexander Maclaren

~ This is my doing. ~

I wanted to share the excerpt from Streams in the Desert that really ministered to me today.

This is my doing. ( 1 Kings 12:24)

The disappointments of life are simply the hidden appointments of love.  C.A. Fox

My child, I have a message for you today.  Let me whisper it in your ear so any storm clouds that may arise will shine with glory, and the rough places you may have to walk will be made smooth.  It is only four words, but let them sink into your inner being, and use them as a pillow to rest your weary head.  "This is my doing."

Have you ever realized that whatever concerns you concerns Me too?  "For whoever touches you touches the apple of [my] eye" (Zech. 2:8).  "You are precious and honored in my sight" (Isa. 43:4).  Therefore it is My special delight to teach you.

I want you to learn when temptations attack you, and the enemy comes in "like a pent-up flood" (Isa. 59:19), that "this is my doing" and that your weakness needs My strength, and your safety lies in letting Me fight for you.

Are you in difficult circumstances, surrounded by people who do not understand you, never ask your opinion, and always push you aside?  "This is my doing."  I am the God of circumstances.  You did not come to this place by accident - you are exactly where I meant for you to be.

Have you not asked Me to make you humble?  Then see that I have placed you in the perfect school where this lesson is taught.  Your circumstances and the people around you are only being used to accomplish My will.

Are you having problems with money, finding it hard to make ends meet? "This is my doing," for I am the One who keeps your finances, and I want you to learn to depend upon Me.  My supply is limitless and I "will meet all your needs" (Phil. 4:19).  I want you to prove My promises so no one may say, "You did not trust in the Lord your God" (Deut. 1:32).

Are you experiencing a time of sorrow?  "This is my doing."  I am "a man of sorrows, and familiar with suffering" (Isa. 53:3)  I have allowed your earthly comforters to fail you, so that by turning to Me you may receive "eternal encouragement and good hope" (2 Thess. 2:16).  Have you longed to do some great work for Me but instead have been set aside on a bed of sickness and pain?  "This is my doing."  You were so busy I could not get your attention, and I wanted to teach you some of My deepest truths.  "They also serve who only stand and wait." In fact, some of My greatest workers are those physically unable to serve, but who have learned to wield the powerful weapon of prayer.

Today I place a cup of holy oil in your hands.  Use it freely, My child.  Anoint with it every new circumstance, every word that hurts you, every interruption that makes you impatient, and every weakness you have.  The pain will leave as you learn to see Me in all things.  Laura A. Barter Snow

~ God in a Box ~

The mailbox, that is!  Yesterday, Catalyst sent out 10,000 invites for the surrounding neighbors and families to join us at our new Regal Cinemas location.  This kind of takes me back to Catalyst's pre-launch days.

I used to drive through Kent and think and pray about the people near-by who had no idea that God was about to rock their world through a new church (Catalyst).  I used to pray for college students to meet God for the first time.  Marriages to be restored.  Families to be strengthened and make God the #1 priority.  I would be overcome by the potential impact Catalyst would have on these unsuspecting people.  

I felt a similar dynamic this morning.  I drive Josiah to gymnastics every Tuesday morning.  We drive through Stow to class each week.  This morning when I stopped at a red light in Stow, I glanced around at the houses surrounding me.  My immediate thought was, "you are going to get something potentially life changing in your mail box today!"  I then began to count the number of houses I could see.  The thought of all these families having an opportunity to be engaged by the Gospel was overwhelming to me.  Even if just one household per street is impacted, that could totally transform our local community! 

Join with me and others and pray big prayers for these mailers this week!  God will do immeasurably more than we ask or can imagine!

~ The voice of God ~

God's "voice" can come to us in many ways.  He speaks to us through His Word (the Bible), friends, other believers, strangers, songs, saints of old (i.e. Tozer) and so on.  God's voice can be loud, soft as a whisper or repetitive (like a toddler asking "why?" continually).  I experienced that last dynamic just this morning!

Becoming a parent changes your life in every way imaginable.  Some ways are expected, but most are not.  I am still surprised by the ways my life is different because I now hold the title "Mommy."  Two of the areas that I have really noticed and focused on lately are 1)friendships and 2) time with God (reading the Bible & praying). 

I am learning that it is absolutely challenging to have friends and be a friend with little ones at home!  The time constraints make it hard to find a time that fits into your child's schedule, impromptu does not exist in your vocabulary anymore and being able to actually pay attention to what the other person is saying is challenging (you moms know what I am talking about!).  The friendships that come easiest in this stage of life are with other moms in that same stage.  There is an unspoken understanding of what you are facing and a certain camaraderie.  The problem for me, has been, where do I meet these women? 

There are also friendships with people who do not currently have kids.  These can be great!  These friends have more flexibility (sometimes) and can come to you (after your kid is in bed).  They can be hard, too, however.  No matter how hard they try or want to, they just can't understand exactly what you are experiencing.  I have concluded that both types of friendship are needed and in balance in your life!   

The second area that I have been working through is my time with God.  I used to have great times of quiet reading, praying, reflection, listening to music and sipping my coffee...before Josiah.  LOL.  I have really struggled for two years now to figure out what this looks like when you are a mom.  I recently decided to just take time to read my Bible while Josiah is up and playing.  Last week, he came up to me and said, "Hi Mommy!  What are you doing here?"  I told him I was reading my Jesus book and asked if he wanted to read his.  He said yes.  We then sat in the living room for a half hour reading our Jesus books together.  I tried that again today, but he was not so interested in sticking with the book.  I was getting increasingly frustrated with the interruptions in my reading (between Josiah and the dog!). 

God spoke to me about this.  Not right then.  I turned on my computer about an hour later to see that I had an email from one of my best friends - Becky!  She rarely is on the computer to email me so I was surprised.  I met her while we lived in Michigan and we had a natural connection.  She will be a life long friend.  Anyhow, God used her to speak to me today.  She wrote saying, "Hi! Just was thinking about you over the weekend and this am and thought I'd drop you a quick line to let you know the Lord compelled me to pray for you this morning as a mom and wife- that you would turn to the Lord to show you how He wants to love your guys through you today :)." My eyes began to tear up as I read this.  It is so easy for me to lose sight of how important it is for God's love to flow through me to my child (and husband).  It was like God was telling me, "I know you are frustrated that you don't remember what you just read in your Bible, but I am going to use it and you anyway.  Keep trying."

I went from my emails to my blogs.  I discovered a link to Blisfully Domestic in one of them.  What was the topic?  "Quiet Time With Not-So-Quiet Kids"  The author shares all about how God has taught her to have her time with Him while her kids are watching so she can model to them.  She shared the challenges with this, but also how consistency is paying off.  It's worth reading if this is where you are right now too!

Somehow, after those moments, it was much easier for me to face the day.  It doesn't matter if every single hour Josiah's pants get changed because he wet them again!  God is using me and how I approach and love my son through these times.  I want Josiah to see God in me more than me in me! 

Thanks, God, for your voice through a dear friend and a complete stranger!  I am listening (or at least trying to!).

~ Heat - God in the Real World ~

More from How People Change...

Here is the humbling truth:  Trials do not cause us to be what we have not been; rather; they reveal what we have been all along.  The harvest the trial produces is the result of roots already in our hearts.

~ What are you afraid of? ~

Catalyst is going through the book of Mark right now.  Jonathan is encouraging all of us to read the passages at home during the week and use the study guide for further information.  I was reading through the passages of this week (Mark 3:7-6:6) and found a really intriguing little section...

Mark 5

Jesus Heals a Man with a Demon

1^(A) They came to the other side of the sea, to the country of the Gerasenes.^[a] 2And when Jesus^[b] had stepped out of the boat, immediately there met him out of the tombs a man with an unclean spirit. 3^(B) He lived among the tombs. And no one could bind him anymore, not even with a chain, 4for he had often been bound with shackles and chains, but he wrenched the chains apart, and he broke the shackles in pieces. No one had the strength to subdue him. 5Night and day among the tombs and on the mountains he was always crying out and cutting himself with stones. 6And when he saw Jesus from afar, he ran and^(C) fell down before him. 7And^(D) crying out with a loud voice, he said, "What have you to do with me, Jesus,^(E) Son of^(F) the Most High God?^(G) I adjure you by God, do not torment me." 8For he was saying to him,

"Come out of the man, you unclean spirit!"

9And Jesus asked him,

"What is your name?"

He replied, "My name is^(H) Legion, for we are many." 10And he begged him earnestly not to send them out of the country. 11Now a great herd of pigs was feeding there on the hillside, 12and they begged him, saying, "Send us to the pigs; let us enter them." 13So he gave them permission. And the unclean spirits came out, and entered the pigs, and the herd, numbering about two thousand, rushed down the steep bank into the sea and were drowned in the sea.

14The herdsmen fled and told it in the city and in the country. And people came to see what it was that had happened. 15And they came to Jesus and saw the demon-possessed^[c] man, the one who had had^(I) the legion, sitting there,^(J) clothed and in his right mind, and they were afraid. 16And those who had seen it described to them what had happened to the demon-possessed man and to the pigs. 17And^(K) they began to beg Jesus^[d] to depart from their region.

I would be totally freaked out if right outside my town was a crazy, naked, self-mutilating person like the demon possessed man described in this passage!  He was basically trying to stone himself or something - NOT NORMAL!  Jesus comes along and heals the man.  How will the people respond?  Do they thank Jesus over and over again because now they feel that it is safe again for their children to run and play?  Are they in awe of Jesus' power and insight?  Nope.  They see the man calm and clothed and they are AFRAID????  My thought is, "what the heck?"  The guy used to be a total scary weirdo and now he is normal and him being normal scares you?  They go one step further and they ask Jesus to leave their town! 

I am sure there are some deeper historical meanings here.  In fact, I think I remember studying this and discovering that the demon guy was a big source for their economy, but I want to look past that.  I think that the people of this town might have gotten so comfortable with the sin around them and the sin within them that when that sin was restored through Jesus, they were afraid.  The process of sin being restored and repentance requires great sacrifice and change.  It is not an easy process. And change usually involves pain.

It's easy to read these types of passages and think, "I would never be so stupid or blind after having a personal encounter with Jesus like that."  I would argue, however, that we do it everyday.  Jonathan mentioned a few weeks ago how our culture doesn't encounter demon possession because Satan has a hold of us in other ways (materialism, self-sufficiency, pride - to name a few).  Our entire society and often we ourselves are entrenched in sin.  How do we respond when we experience a strong conviction from Jesus?  Are we afraid? 

Let me make this more personal....Jonathan and I are in the process of totally overhauling our personal finances.  The end result of this process will honor God and enable us to give more freely.  The process itself, however requires sacrifice and change.  Honestly, this is a bit scary!  We are in the process of giving up some extra comforts and privlidges (that our society claims we are entitled to).  You see, like the people of the Gerasenes, I have grown comfortable in some sin in my life and giving that up leads to some fear (if I am honest). 

Another example of this principle that I see around me all the time is in relationships.  I have seen many Christians entrenched in a relationship that is not God-honoring.  They just can't seem to give it up, though.  Why?  They are afraid of the changes it will mean in their life (and change can really hurt sometimes!). 

Let's look at how the demon man responded to Jesus....

8As he was getting into the boat, the man who had been possessed with demons begged him that he might be with him. 19And he did not permit him but said to him,

"Go home to your friends and^(A) tell them how much the Lord has done for you, and how he has had mercy on you."

20And he went away and began to proclaim in^(B) the Decapolis how much Jesus had done for him, and everyone marveled.

He BEGS to stay with Jesus!  He has personally experienced the restoration that Jesus offers and he doesn't want to let it go.  He never wants to forget!  Jesus redirects him to share this story and experience with others.  The man does this and the attitude of the people becomes awe!  When we allow Jesus to restore us from sin areas in our life, our fear is turned to fear (awe)! 

Lord - forgive me for fearing letting go of sin in my life more than the awe I have for you.  Help me to abandon all else to be restored by You.  Amen.

~ Depravity not Morality ~

One of the home studies I am working on right now is about an hour's drive away.  My ipod randomly brought up a C.J. Mahaney message while driving tonight and I stuck with it.  The message was a second in a two part series on Gospel Centered Parenting.  There were numerous take aways (I'd like to listen again when I can take notes) but one big thing stuck out to me.

Mahaney was emphasizing the importance of the undertone of our parenting being to lead our children to the Gospel.  He was also discussing the vital role that scripture plays in this process.  Then he made the following statement:

The purpose of Scripture (and the story of the life of Jesus) is not morality (or to provide a moral example to emulate) but rather to expose a person's depravity. 

He went on to say how when we presume to be able to act just like Jesus, we are taking away the whole message of the fact that we are sinners in need of a Savior.  He is not against the moral examples provided in scripture, however he is stating that it is not the main thing. 

I think this is a vital message for our times.  We live in an age of social justice and WWJD.  Our moral acts, however, should not stem from trying harder but as a response to the mercy and grace of Jesus!  Do I want Josiah to learn strong morals and have good behavior?  You bet!  I do not want that to be the main message he gets from me as a parent.  His good behavior is nothing without the Gospel fueling it.  Once again, I was challenged and reminded of the daunting task of parenting and above all leading my child to the feet of Jesus in all I do (even my mistakes!).