I have been writing this post in my head for over a month now. I was at work the day we found out that the judge had signed our placement papers and Ainsleigh could come home from host care. The timing worked out that Jon had previous engagements that he could not get out of. So, Josiah and I traveled across the great state of Michigan immediately after school to pick up our new addition!
It was kind of surreal for me to be driving with my sweet (and excited!) 5 year old son knowing this would be the end of our time of him being the only child. I found myself reflecting on the last five years and the day we brought him home. He has grown and changed so much! We faced joys beyond what we could even imagine and some challenges that the Lord gave us strength to endure.
Early on in our journey, Josiah and I had a conversation that reminded me of the goal of our parenting: we want to raise sons and daughters that are captured by the grace and love of Jesus and use that passion to change the world! This conversation helped me feel like despite our moments of weakness, Jesus is working to achieve this goal.
We were passing a cemetery while driving when the conversation began.
Josiah: That's where people are buried when they die. There are a lot of people that died over there. Did they die because of sin?
Me: Yes, Josiah, that's right. When sin entered the world with Adam and Eve, God made it so people would die. He did not want us to live forever in sin and not have a relationship with us - He loves us too much to allow that.
Josiah: Well, I have done lots of bad things, so does that mean I have to die too and be separated from God?
Me: The Bible says that everyone makes bad choices and sins. The good news is that we can still have a relationship with God? Do you know how?
Josiah: Jesus died on the cross.
Me: That's right. So if you belive that Jesus died for your sins and ask Him to be the boss or leader of your life, then you can have a relationship with God now and be with Him forever in heaven when you leave this earth.
Josiah: But sometimes, I still make bad choices.
Me: Well, everyone has a hard time making bad choices at times. The Bible also says that when we ask Jesus to lead us, we get the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit is God too. He is there to help us make the right choices and not turn to sin.
Josiah: Oh, ok. I already have Him.
Then the conversation moved on to some topic important to 5 year old boys. I was smiling to myself and teary-eyed though. My son "gets it" at the young age of five. This is one area, by the grace of God, we seem to be succeeding as parents! I cannot imagine a better way of ending my time with Josiah as my only child! My heart was just overflowing!
My introspection continued as we journeyed back home with our new little bundle. The whole time, I found myself silently thanking God for these two blessings. I believe that every child is uniquely planned and placed in their family whether through birth or adoption. There's just a part of me though, that knows without ANY doubt, God made these two children especially for our family! It is overwhelming. The birth families didn't just happen to pick us. It is not a coinicidence. The children (and birth families) we prayed years for arrived in our family at the exact right time and under the exact right circumstances.
We belong together.
My journey was 3 hours each way with my children that day, however, it has been set in motion for eternity.
"Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows." - James 1:17